June 10, 2011

Facebook

I think Facebook is a great way to stay connected to people I wouldn't normally get to keep in touch with. At the same time, is is addicting and can be such a waste of time.

Let's face it though, people only put on Facebook what they want others to see and know. There's some who update their status every hour including every detail of their life and others who only update once a month or less. For me, I feel like I'm somewhere in between. I admit, similar to my blog, Cooper has made an appearance more often than not lately, I mean he is just so adorable, how can I not post his daily pictures of cuteness? But there are some people who live through and on it, posting all their daily struggles and happiest of times. And sadly, I'm the sucker who is there reading all their updates and going through every random picture someone posts. In all honesty, it's just a huge time-waster for me.

I've said it before but shortly after Jason and I were married, I suddenly felt the pressures to get pregnant and pop out our first kid. Facebook has made me start comparing myself to what others are doing, how many kids they have, where and how many bedrooms their first (or second or third) house has, and the hardest one lately is how successful they are at their job, or even that they have a job. Last week, I had a hard couple of days and actually found myself wanting to have the life of someone who had posted an adorable picture of their three year old son. I thought, "Oh, they have the cutest family of four, they live in a really nice house in the north suburbs, she has a steady job." (something I REALLY miss having!) I found myself being completely envious of this one person and feeling so sorry for myself. Lucky for me it was only 15 minutes later that I remember that this was the friend who's now husband cheated on her back in college and she so easily took him back. While yes, they're happily married now, they had a very bumpy road. That's one bumpy road I hope to never have to go down. Today things look all cheery and happy for them but we all have our difficult times. I am sure had we had Facebook when that was going on this particular person wouldn't have been broadcasting her marriage problems all over face book (at least I hope not!). When I'm down, its just so easy to get caught up in all of what people post and want to make you believe is the perfect life.

In addition to struggling with that, I find myself checking my newsfeed all the time. I mean it, all the time. I don't even know I'm doing it or realize I'm looking at my phone, but I'll have facebook pulled up. And since I have probably 85% of my "friends" hidden, I see the same updates and same pictures over and over again. I know it's partially part of the loneliness factor in my life because I don't have nearly the human interaction that I wish I had with not being employed, but at this point it's just a time-waster and like I said, can really bring me down when I have absolutely nothing to be down about!

While reading my devotions this morning I realized how little time I spend with God these days. I don't have much of a routine to my days lately, so while I make every effort for my quiet time with God, it's cut very short by other distractions. There's nothing forcing me to get that time in like there would be if I had to be out the door at a certain time. I wish I had a way to track just how much time is spent on Facebook, I'm sure I'd be shocked, but I feel that the time has come to put it to an end. At this point in my life, there's no way I would consider canceling my account, like I said, I love how I'm able to keep in touch with friends and family I wouldn't normally get updates from. But there was a time in our lives that we didn't have Facebook and my life was going along just fine.

Started this morning, I implemented a new rule: I'm not allowed on Facebook from 9am-9pm. Jason laughed when I told him that and said I should probably make it 5pm instead. (Good to know he has so much faith in me. ;-) When I say I won't be on Facebook between those hours I mean that I won't be checking my newsfeed, but I can still post status updates or pictures and send/respond to Facebook messages. Updating a status or picture or responding to an email isn't what I feel needs to be cut. I hope to use the sporadic times I've used on Facebook to read a book, journal or pray or whatever other healthier things I'd like to do.

I share this on here as a way to help hold me accountable. By writing it out and then actually posting this, I hope it will help me really stay off. I'd love if you'd share some of your thoughts about Facebook, how it has helped or possibly affected you like it has for me. I know I'm not alone in this but am glad I can hopefully put it to rest and start making better use of my time! Wish me luck and I'll see you all on Facebook at 9:00pm sharp tonight!

1 comment:

  1. I'm in the same boat...finding myself envying these new homes that people are buying because I want so desperately to sell ours and be in a place I can call "home" :)
    It's all balance. Everything in life is balance and since you are aware of these feelings, you are moving in the right direction! :)

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